Michigan, Idaho, Montana, North Dakota, and South Dakota have all urged the US Supreme Court to overturn Obergefell v. Hodges, the 2015 decision that federally legalized same-sex marriage. But this move isn’t as straightforward as many activists on both sides would have you believe. Even if Obergefell is ultimately overturned, other laws and rulings complicate things. The Respect for Marriage Act requires states to acknowledge the legal marriages of other states, and United States v. Windsor struck down key parts of the anti-LGBT Defense of Marriage Act. Should Obergefell fall while Windsor stands, same-sex marriages would still be recognized at the federal level, even if individual states banned them. Yet, the implications are deeply troubling. We could return to a system where some states honor same-sex marriages, while others don’t — a legal patchwork that could severely constrain LGBT rights and upend the decades of work leading up to Obergefell. As a 29-year-old lesbian engaged to be married, this turn of events is personal for me. And it may be one I helped contribute to.
When the “woke” mania swept the country in 2020, I took a step back and reevaluated where I stood and why I stood there. To my surprise, I found that I agreed with conservatives and libertarians on a number of issues. I opposed childhood gender transitions, unlawful and divisive DEI mandates, and the excesses of Critical Race Theory. I argued against biological males competing in women’s sports and being housed in women’s prisons. I did so loudly and publicly, losing many friends along the way. My stance wasn’t rooted in hate or fear but in a commitment to reason and fairness. My loyalty was to the truth, not to political tribes. Maintaining my integrity cost me greatly, but I believed it was worth it.
I went even further — I joined a nonpartisan organization as a legal analyst, advocating for parental rights in schools, against race-based affirmative action, and opposing radical gender ideology. I wrote legal letters, spoke at universities that plastered my face on fliers calling me a bigot, and partnered with conservative attorneys who, I believed, were fighting to preserve fundamental American values. I stood shoulder to shoulder with them on the cultural battlefield, committed to protecting gender-nonconforming children’s welfare while still supporting trans adults who simply wanted to live their lives in peace. It was the most extreme activist voices — those who called lesbians transphobic for only wanting to sleep with women and who prioritized trans women’s feelings over the safety of cisgender women — that I opposed. I recognized that these excesses were not just putting trans adults’ rights in jeopardy, but the gay and bi communities’ as well. The fringe was threatening all of us. Acceptance of same-sex marriage began to decline for the first time in a decade. We needed to course correct, and fast.
I was aware of the ever-present elements of the far-right who have always opposed same-sex marriage and the existence of trans-identifying adults, but I didn’t expect the “reasonable” right to join their ranks so quickly once the power dynamic shifted.
Today, some of those same attorneys I worked with are advocating for my right to marry my fiancée to be stripped away. They are urging the Supreme Court to invalidate my engagement and to deny me the protections and benefits that heterosexual couples take for granted. Twitter is rife with homophobic posts calling gay and bi people demonic and disgusting, and attempting to oust us from the Republican Party. They blame us for the overreaches of trans activism, claiming that same-sex marriage was the “slippery slope” that preceded the extremes taking root. They argue that marriage should be between a man and a woman, period. Their legal briefs couch it in historical tradition, religious freedom, and states’ rights, but the message is clear: my love, my commitment, and my family is not worthy of legal recognition. I’m a Christian woman. It took a long time for me to make my way back to the church after coming out, but my faith is now stronger than ever. My fiancée and I plan to be married in the church. Now it seems that even though our church is willing to marry us, the government might not recognize it.
This is a dangerous game right-wing culture warriors are playing. If Obergefell falls, it won’t just impact same-sex couples. It will set a precedent that fundamental rights can be granted and taken away by the shifting winds of political power. This should concern every American, regardless of their stance on same-sex marriage.
I can think of a hundred issues more pressing to the American public than the existence of same-sex marriage: inflation, the cost of healthcare, national security, the war in Gaza — the list goes on. But a growing faction of the right is drunk on power, using its current dominance to wage a culture war against its own citizens as retribution for the last number of years. “Owning the libs” is their preferred method of revenge. Instead of tackling inflation or healthcare, they are targeting millions like me who want nothing more than to live our lives freely and equally.
Many will say I should have seen this coming — that the right has and always will be against LGBT rights. And maybe there’s some truth to that. But that just wasn’t my experience. I was met with open arms by this messy coalition of ex-Democrats and lifelong Republicans, many of whom still support me and my right to marry. I found a community committed to reason and truth. Perhaps I’m simply realizing that there are fewer of us than I originally thought. The radical right is on the warpath against liberalism, trampling centrists, libertarians, and reasonable ring-wingers in the process. Ultimately, I don’t regret my decision. I worked toward what I believed — and still believe — to be true. I still oppose radical gender ideology and Critical Race Theory in schools. I still believe that biological males shouldn’t compete in women’s sports or be housed in women’s prisons. But I will not stand by while LGBT rights are legislated away.
Consider the recent controversy surrounding the gay journalist Glenn Greenwald, who has become a popular figure in right-populist circles in the past few years. When explicit videos from his private life were leaked — depicting consensual, fetishistic encounters and possible drug use — the right-wing response fractured. Some, like Megyn Kelly, defended him, calling the leak an irrelevant “attempt to embarrass him.” But the backlash was fierce and disturbing. A vocal contingent of the right, including pundits with large platforms and significant influence, seized the moment to denounce gay people writ large. Never mind the fact that fetish and kink are widespread among straight people as well. Conservative author and podcaster Allie Beth Stuckey, for example, used the occasion to argue that same-sex marriage had paved the way for child genital mutilation and drag queens reading to kids, suggesting that gay couples should never have been granted marriage or adoption rights in the first place. Others implied that Greenwald had “bought” his adopted children and needed to be “delivered” from homosexuality.
The whole affair made something clear: for many on the right, their past tolerance of gay and bi people who aligned with them on a few pet issues was never rooted in principle. It was always about convenience. We were never truly accepted — just temporarily useful. And now that some of us have outlived our political utility, they’re more than happy to throw us to the wolves the moment the opportunity arises.
The conservative movement has a choice to make: will they stay true to their promises of liberty and limited government, or will they use the levers of power to impose their preferred moral order? I joined forces with them because I believed in the former. I fear they are choosing the latter.
Many on the cultural right are forgetting something critical: same-sex marriage doesn’t infringe upon anyone else’s rights. A crucial argument against gender ideology was the infringement on women’s rights. But unlike trans edge cases such as women’s sports or prisons, marriage isn’t a zero-sum issue. There isn’t a finite number of spots on the “marriage team.” My getting married takes nothing away from straight couples. And I will fight for my right to do so just as fiercely as I fought against radical ideologies that threatened other American values.
Conservatives can either stand for freedom, or they can stand for oppression — but they cannot do both. If they truly value individual liberty, they should defend our right to marry. If they turn on us now, they reveal who they really are.
Trump won in 2024 in part due to the left’s overreach. If the right continues down this path, they could meet a similar fate in future elections. As more people come out as LGBT, and as more LGBT people voice concerns with far-left activist orthodoxies, Republicans should be broadening the tent, not excluding these people and pushing them away. Hemorrhaging potential voters to get your druthers isn’t a winning political strategy. The pendulum from hell will just keep swinging back and forth until we all decide we’ve had enough.
/- By Reid Newton
We need to autopsy this brain. It might be the smoothest object ever discovered. Lots of material science applications here.
Teflon 2.0
lesbianstransphobes like meftfy
racist too, but the title is already long enough
Well that was fucking stupid.
TLDR: I drank the KoolAid then did as much as I could to convince others drink the KoolAid. Now I’m shocked that we were all poisoned.
Stupid fuckers.
She can’t sit with us.
I still believe that biological males shouldn’t compete in women’s sports or be housed in women’s prisons.
So you’ve still learned nothing. As a transitioned trans person who this person, if I were arrested, would like to subject me to daily rape torture? She can go die in a fire.
They want prison rape, lots of people find that to be a feature not a flaw.
It’s a foundational flaw in our system of law, are we rehabilitating or retaliating?
“I supported conservatives because I wanted to oppress trans people and non-white people. Why do conservatives want to oppress me???”
What a fucking moron.
they think white supremecy is enought o shield them from homophobia.
With the way it kept escalating, I kept waiting for something even more bizarrely hateful and ignorant, but thankfully, the article ended. I took the liberty of editing a passage to showcase my perspective on the logic here. Edited sections are in CAPS:
Many on the cultural right are forgetting something critical: LESBIAN marriage doesn’t infringe upon anyone else’s rights. A crucial argument against MALE GAY MARRIAGE was the infringement on women’s rights. But unlike GAY MALE edge cases such as INTERIOR DECORATING or FLORISTS, LESBIAN marriage isn’t a zero-sum issue. There isn’t a finite number of spots on the “LESBIAN marriage SALON
team.” My getting married takes nothing away from straight couples. And I will fight for my right to do so just as fiercely as I fought against OTHER MINORITY ideologies that threatened MY INSULAR, SELFISH WORLDVIEWother American values.You’re forgetting the male incel epidemic, including the ones who legitimately want the government to issue them a girlfriend. I’m sure some of them feel that the only reason they didn’t have a girlfriend is that “their girlfriend” mistakenly believes she’s gay or was “taken” by a lesbian. Similar to that guy who was like “I’m sure the reason I don’t have a girlfriend is that the one who was destined to be mine got aborted by some ‘liberated’ woman”.
Conservatives absolutely believe gay marriage takes something away from them, agreed. I was just doing a farcical bit in which she ironically doesn’t realize her sexual orientation politics are vulnerable to the consequences of her crusade against gender politics. I’m not much of a writer, though. Sorry if it was a little unclear.
Also, having been on the receiving end of government-issued goods on occasion, I’d caution incels/femcels/themcels against government-issued partners. There exist sublime domestic horrors much worse than being unpartnered, being celibate, and being lonely.
I opposed (…) the excesses of Critical Race Theory.
Tell me you don’t understand Critical Race Theory without telling me you don’t understand Critical Race Theory.
Also, once again, someone joined MAGA simply because they hate one group (trans) a little more than they hate you (lesbian). This idiot is getting what they deserve, but sadly, other people are getting it too.
I can think of a hundred issues more pressing to the American public than the existence of same-sex marriage: inflation, the cost of healthcare, national security, the war in Gaza — the list goes on.
Oh yeah, now you can think of a hundred more important issues. Didn’t seem to concern them when fighting against uh… critical race theory and DEI? Okay.
I went even further — I joined a nonpartisan organization as a legal analyst, advocating for parental rights in schools, against race-based affirmative action, and opposing radical gender ideology.
She’s a legal analyst for Foundation Against Intolerance and Racism (FAIR). It is not nonpartisan and her degree is in Dance.
Ah, the Internet. Where we all get a platform whether we’re qualified or not.
I don’t want to name it but an ovary themed terf forum I’m aware of has so many lesbians who are in this category, I was especially confused by them when looking around the site and was genuinely surprised how many there were there. A lot of them seemed to especially be anti female to male on top of their normal “TiM” hate and they didn’t seem to realize trans men and lesbians aren’t actually the same thing… idk it’s a bizarre subset, the whole place was filled with circular logic, blatantly anti-feminist takes, crunchy to conspiracy types. I think terf spaces are just the female version of the man-o-sphere tbh
Didn’t that site shut down?
I feel like this anger towards trans-lesbians is a spiralling problem caused by a minority of both groups acting out.
I had two trans-lesbian friends who grew increasingly aggressive and abusive towards me when they discovered I wasn’t attracted to them physically or romantically, despite me never claiming to be bi or lesbian in any capacity. It got to the point where I developed a fear towards them that I would liken to that of a fear of an aggressive, sexually frustrated man. I cut them off before it escalated to something more intimately violent.
I don’t hate trans-women or trans-lesbians because of it, but that’s because I viewed this behaviour as their own and not as a collective trait. It would be incredibly easy for me to just say all trans-lesbians are like that, and therefore I should exclude them from my life. But my experience is not unique, considering the growing disrest in the lesbian community.
What’s TiM?
deleted by creator
TERF term for trans woman. It stands for “trans-identified male.” Presumably TERFs felt clever having the acronym be a man’s name.
I still oppose radical gender ideology and Critical Race Theory in schools. I still believe that biological males shouldn’t compete in women’s sports or be housed in women’s prisons. But I will not stand by while LGBT rights are legislated away.
The classic “fuck everyone, I want mine” mindset.
They don’t seem to know what the ‘T’ stands for.
It stands for “tlesbian” in her mind, but the ‘T’ is silent, or at least it will be if she gets her way.
Lesbian, Glesbian, Blesbian, Tlesbian, Plesbian
Lack of empathy is a defining right wing characteristic.
Normally I’m not a commenter, but reading this article made me cringe harder and harder as the article went on. Never have I seen someone so self confident in the decisions they made that are potentially going to ruin their own life. She was so happy to tell us how anti trans she was and still is, but she complains that her anti trans advocacy is now leading to discrimination against her. Truly a prefect leopard eating face moment. Hell, it seems like she still supports the leopard, despite her head being in it’s mouth.
“Lesbian TERF fucks around and finds out” is what the headline should read.
Plus contrast her outrage over trans rights, with her defense of lgbt rights. When she’s the one being harmed, every argument she tries is also valid when she’s doing the harm
She’s screaming, with her head in the leopard’s mouth, “But I can be useful!”
We have a term around here: “Confidently incorrect”. Too fucking stupid to see how fucking stupid they are, and certain their opinion means much more than your facts.
I opposed childhood gender transitions, unlawful and divisive DEI mandates, and the excesses of Critical Race Theory. I argued against biological males competing in women’s sports and being housed in women’s prisons.
Thus proving a basic misunderstanding of most of these issues. Welcome to the future that you voted for, sucks for all of us.
The whole article translates to:
I let myself be used as a tool for hatred.
“They hated who I hated! I didn’t think they’d hate me, too!”
“And even after I started realizing it, I didn’t learn anything”
When the “woke” mania swept the country in 2020, I took a step back and reevaluated where I stood and why I stood there. To my surprise, I found that I agreed with conservatives and libertarians on a number of issues.
That whole paragraph screams “I watched Fox News and found myself in a conservative media bubble.” This dumbass fell into the hate trap and thought “If I hate like them, they’ll know I’m one of the good ones and will accept me.”
May the leopards feast upon her gullible face.